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LIGHT POTATO CHIPS

by Frank Wu

I was hungry, but it wasn't lunchtime yet, so I went to the snack machine in the kitchen. Hmm, decisions, decisions. Potato chips. Yeah, that. Low-fat. Even better. I put in my dimes, my nickels, my quarter. The bag's the same size, but you hardly get anything for your money these days. I hit A3. The coil spun around to release the chips, but the bag didn't come down. It wasn't stuck, it was floating. Through the glass I saw the bag of chips bobbing around inside the snack machine, like a silver balloon filled with nothing but air. Well, the packaging did say "Light." I pointed at it and complained to a coworker. He just shrugged and proceeded to eat the thumb-sized cookie he'd paid a quarter for. Still, the bag of chips was suspended inside the machine. It was so light. I pounded my palm on the metal, and I pushed the coin return. I rocked the machine. Still the bag wouldn't come down. It was so light. Finally, I got so mad that I picked up a chair and threw it at the snack machine. Bam! The bag of chips drifted casually out from between the shards of broken glass, and I snatched it before it could reach the stratosphere. Finally, I had my chips! Of course, I was responsible to Aramark food services for the damage to the snack machine. That bag of chips cost me four hundred dollars. And after I ate it, I was still hungry. It was that light.

 

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